Today it had thunderstorm
Summerize my recent life within one word: Empty.
really?
It did happen something, like waking up at 8 or 9 then missing my Physics or English class, sighing, then realizing the next class is P.E. or self-studying, turned my head to the pillow. Or surfing the internet while the teacher was teaching so-called “Cheats”, and did real cheat in exams. Doing homework that was distributed in the good old day, found out don’t know where to start, frustrated, then open my PS5.
Enough.
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I set my plan for the next day then end up with no achievements. sitting on the desk, taking my pen, doing my Chemistry homework, thinking, wasting my time with no stroke on the paper. I have had enough, but how can I resist?
Last two days I don’t get the motivation to study, in my opinion, that’s caused by the work I overstock is too much which makes me escape, and anesthetize myself by gaming the roleplaying game, surfing the internet, especially social media, watching porn, etc.
I’m depressed with my school or even the whole Chinese education system. Teachers told us to study hard, to make it advanced, they ask us to complete a spreadsheet and send it to a group where every classmate is when we finish the homework. They claim it is a method for students to drive each other, but I consider this is pushing the oppression to a further level, they finish your homework not because they want to, but because they think it’s shameful if they don’t finish it. What the Fuck? We need to work hard because it’s shameful if we don’t? What’s our value? Your answer is “work”, right? Then what’s the difference between human and machine? Personal value is defined by our capability in society, I consent. But school never told us how to live. Oh you told me, you said we should live on increasing our value, your value is you, work is your life, your work is your duty. I study 11 years, that’s what you implied. Where is my true duty? Oh, it has been blocked on Weibo, leaving with a tank cake. Who knows, Who cares? Did you get 100 on tests? Shut you fuck mouth, did you finish the GaoKao? Your mouth brith to speak Chinese merits, your knowledge is learned to compliment China. If you don’t, be a convict, you harm our national security.
By exploiting the bonus of population, China may have an bright furture, but Chinese people is hopeless, they are not educating human, but slaves.
My say ends here.
there is locked down again, no school again. I’ll make use of the crack.